it's been maybe 2 years since everything started. slowly from a stranger in school to a friend's friend to a friend whom i've actually known. Sometimes i really wonder if this is true or maybe a passing phase. But after so long, i guess not. I am still hanging to this only hope i have. But it is this thin fine line between that is holding me back. Why is this so difficult? I don't even have an answer. Often at times, i laugh it off thinking that i am silly and putting on a strong front. But deep down, its just the opposite that i don't show.
And now, distance apart, makes things even worse. But i am grateful for the internet as form of communication. Weeks and days pass, 9months of hell. I've got maybe 3.5years. So will time tell? Will time give me an answer?
And maybe sometimes i don't know if i think too much, thinking of the underlying meaning of everything said? maybe it's just that simple. sometimes i don't know what to reply/say and yet i feel like i've got so much things to say. this irony of it all.
A thousand thoughts running through my mind. Putting it in words makes me feel so much better.
I'll wait, and maybe one day i'll just let go, let go of everything.
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